Uncertain Joy

Uncertain Joy

As I am writing, we face another three weeks of lockdown.

I am really not that surprised because the whole point of social distancing is to give our excellent NHS a head start so that when the pandemic peaks they are ready.

It could be you or me or a loved one that might need critical care.

Throughout this change, I am finding joy in the simple things.Uncertain Joy

In normal circumstances, we are hell-bent on bigger, better, faster, more money, consumables and have little time for one another.

The norm is instant gratification, and I am guilty as any other.

I don’t have the patience to wait and want it now.

I am never bored because I’m always busy with a day full of to do’s, school runs and a business to run.

Since being home-based, I have adjusted to a different way of living undoubtedly slow and definitely more meaningful.

If you read my earlier blog, when all of this began, I was in a state of worry waking up in the middle of the night with cold sweats feeling panicked and fearful.

The news hasn’t helped with reports of doom and gloom it is difficult to see a glimmer at the end of a very long tunnel.

There’s nothing in the news that gives us any real hope other than Captain Tom and his great walk to celebrate his 100 years birthday while raising a staggering £26m for NHS charities.

In this chaos, I am taking my time.

In the first week, I was hell-bent on following the usual work schedule, and by the second and third week, I began to ease down.

It will still be there tomorrow I told myself.

I am taking joy in the simple things in life.

Uncertain JoyI hear the doorbell and immediately open the gate for our postwoman, and we have our customary chat.

There’s no hope of a holiday this year, but I am not letting that upset me.

I spend a few minutes thumbing through the photos taken of the last three summers with a smile on my face as I recall the fun and the laughter of those happy memories.

Although the last three weeks have been tough, we’ve been blessed with great weather perfectly timed for the Easter holidays.

There is something to be thankful every day.

Feeling the sun’s warmth on my face is all I need to feel restored again.

A shaft of sunlight reflects off my ceiling, and for one second all is well in the world.

A 20-minute walk around the village and a chat with people who would never have had the time to say hello makes me happy.

Bird song fills the air I don’t need earphones when nature shares its music for free.

I love the new smells when I walk or run, are they new or have they always been there?

I’ve not been in the here and now to acknowledge and appreciate them as I do now.

The smell of creosote sends me back to a calmer more innocent childhood when we climbed trees and played Aky 1-2-3, similar to hide and seek until dusk descended and we could no longer see the lamp post we had to run to.

The smell of magnolia reminds me of my mum and dad’s garden, and I miss them.

I spray perfume every day even if I am doing the housework I don’t want to give up just because I can’t go out.

For the first time I think I am living in the moment I have let go of the worries and stress.

Sure it catches up with me, but I am really appreciating what I have, my home, my family, children, husband and that we are healthy and have food on the table.

For so long, I believe there is always something bigger and better in life, but I am wrong.Uncertain Joy

Our expectations are so high so needy, we never have enough it seems, we want more, so we work harder we chase the same dreams we want more pleasures out of life.

Always after the next new thing only for our hopes and expectations to be dashed when we get it because we are already onto the next something.

Never really content with what we have right now.

Yet here I am, with what I have around me, living in the moment and happy because life is less complicated than it has felt in a long time.

It is the simple pleasures, the warmth of the sun, a walk around the garden, watching the sunset and the moon rise.

A hug from my youngest son, a warm smile from my eldest and a kiss at the bottom of the stairs from my husband.

Simple pleasures simple life what more does anyone need?

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